"can you just tell me the price?"
(what to say next)
The triage nurse asks the same question she’s asked 400 times this week.
“On a scale of one to ten, how bad is the pain?”
The man on the gurney doesn’t answer. His jaw tightens. His wife steps forward.
“Why does that matter? He’s clearly in pain. Just do something.”
The new nurse freezes. Stammers an apology. Skips the question. Moves straight to vitals.
Misses the detail that would’ve changed the treatment plan.
Two bays over, different nurse. Same pushback from a different patient.
“I hear you. The reason I ask is because a 6 gets you one thing and a 9 gets you something completely different. But if you’d rather just show me where it hurts, we can start there. Which works better for you?”
Patient points. Talks. Nurse gets what she needs in 30 seconds.
Same resistance. Two different responses.
One lost critical information. The other gained it AND built trust while doing it.
Now think about the last time you asked a prospect a qualification question in the DMs and they pushed back.
“Why do you need to know that?”
“Can you just tell me the price?”
“I don’t see how that’s relevant.”
You probably did what the first nurse did.
You apologized. Backed off. Skipped the question.
Or worse, you over-explained yourself for 3 paragraphs and watched them go cold.
The question wasn’t the problem. Your response to their resistance was.
Today, you’re getting the 3-part response formula that turns qualification resistance into deeper trust, plus the prevention system that stops most pushback before it starts.
→ Why the way you respond to pushback matters more than the question you asked
→ The 4 types of resistance and what’s actually behind each one
→ How to build “escape hatches” into your questions so prospects never feel cornered
Let’s fix the way you handle pushback...
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3 Steps That Turn Qualification Resistance Into Trust
Most coaches treat pushback like a stop sign. It’s not. It’s a yellow light.
The prospect isn’t saying “go away.”
They’re saying “slow down and give me a reason to keep going.”
But you can’t respond well if you don’t know what you’re dealing with.
Here’s what actually happens when prospects resist your questions, and exactly what to do about it:
1️⃣ Know Which Wall You’re Hitting
Not all pushback sounds the same because not all pushback means the same thing.
You’re dealing with one of four types every time someone resists a question.
→ Distrust resistance sounds like:
“Why do you need to know that?” or “That’s pretty personal.”
This person got burned by a pushy salesperson before you showed up. They’re protecting themselves.
→ Impatience resistance sounds like:
“Just tell me the price” or “I don’t have time for twenty questions.”
This person respects their own time. They want you to respect it too.
→ Relevance resistance sounds like:
“What does that have to do with anything?”
This person doesn’t understand why you’re asking. The connection between your question and their problem isn’t clear to them.
→ Deflection resistance sounds like:
A vague non-answer, a subject change, or an answer to a completely different question.
This person doesn’t want to reveal something, or they’re testing whether you’ll actually hold the line.
Each type needs a different response.
Responding to impatience the way you’d respond to distrust kills the conversation. Responding to deflection the way you’d respond to relevance lets them off the hook.
Before you respond to pushback, spend two seconds figuring out which wall you hit.
2️⃣ Use the Acknowledge-Bridge-Re-engage Formula
Once you know the type, you run the same three-part formula every time.
Acknowledge their pushback without apologizing.
Validation is not weakness. Apologizing is.
Bridge your question to their benefit or offer them an alternative path.
This is where you show them WHY you asked, or give them a way to answer that feels safer.
Re-engage with a choice.
Don’t demand. Don’t retreat. Give them two options and let them pick.
Here’s what this looks like in practice for each type:
✅ Distrust: “Totally fair to ask. I want to make sure what I suggest actually fits your situation, generic advice wastes both our time. But if you’d rather keep that private, I can share what works for most people in your position and you tell me if it resonates. Which works better?”
✅ Impatience: “I respect that. Quick answer, it ranges from X to Y depending on what you actually need. To give you the real number, I just need to know one thing. What’s your current situation with [specific detail]?”
✅ Relevance: “Good question. The reason I ask is because [specific connection to their outcome]. But if that doesn’t apply to you, we can skip it. Does it?”
✅ Deflection: “I want to make sure I understand, [restate their vague answer]. Is that accurate, or is there more to it?”
Notice what’s missing from every single one of those responses.
An apology.
A five-paragraph explanation of your process.
A defensive justification for why you asked.
You don’t need any of that. You need calm confidence and a bridge to the next step.
3️⃣ Prevent Resistance Before It Happens
The best way to handle pushback is to reduce how often you get it.
You do that with framing. Three types.
→ The Permission Frame.
Ask permission before the question lands. “Mind if I ask a quick question so I can point you in the right direction?”
This one sentence drops resistance by half because you gave them a choice before they felt cornered.
→ The Reason Frame.
Lead with WHY before you ask WHAT. “So I don’t waste your time with stuff that doesn’t apply, what’s your current situation with X?”
When people understand the reason for a question, they almost never push back on it.
→ The Opt-Out Frame.
Build in an escape hatch. “If you’d rather not say, no problem, it just helps me be more specific.” This removes the pressure.
Most people, once they have permission to skip a question, end up answering it anyway.
Go back and look at your qualification questions right now.
If none of them have a permission frame, a reason frame, or an opt-out frame attached, you’re inviting resistance every time you send them.
That’s it.
Here’s what you learned today:
→ Resistance isn’t rejection. It’s a request for a different approach. Your calm, non-defensive response earns MORE trust than if they’d never pushed back at all.
→ Four types of pushback exist… distrust, impatience, relevance, and deflection… and each one needs a different move. Treating them all the same kills conversations.
→ Three framing techniques… permission, reason, and opt-out… prevent most resistance before it starts. If your questions don’t have frames, you’re creating the pushback yourself.
Take the qualification question that gets the most pushback in your DMs.
Rewrite it with a permission frame and a reason frame. Send the new version for a week and watch what changes.
Tonight at 9 PM:
Same ER. Different patient. This one walks in and says “I probably shouldn’t even be here.”
The new nurse sends them to the waiting room. The experienced nurse runs a full workup. Guess which patient had the most serious case of the night?
That “I’m not sure about this” thing your prospects keep saying? It might not mean what you think it means.
Ready to turn your pushback moments into trust-building moments, without rewriting your entire DM strategy?
You’re not pushy… but your DM questions might feel that way.
When prospects resist a question and you don’t have a response ready, the whole conversation stalls.
Today’s paid member mega-prompt builds your complete resistance response system...without making you sound scripted.
Paid members get:
✔ A resistance analyzer that identifies exactly which type of pushback you’re dealing with and what’s behind it
→ Paste any pushback, get the type + the psychology driving it → Get 3 de-escalation responses using the Acknowledge/Bridge/Re-engage formula
✔ A question softener that rewrites your existing qualification questions with Permission, Reason, and Opt-Out frames built in
✔ A text replacement shortcut library with 8 pre-written resistance responses ready to install on your phone, so you never freeze mid-conversation again
