How to fix your DMs in 30 seconds with 3 questions
The "past-you" filter that instantly shows why prospects ghost
You just spent 20 minutes writing the perfect DM.
You explained your value proposition beautifully.
Referenced your credibility subtly.
Positioned yourself as the obvious solution.
You hover over the send button.
Something feels off.
You read it again, but this time you imagine yourself 5 years ago.
Before the certifications.
Before the frameworks.
Before you knew what you know now.
Past you would have deleted this message without responding.
Not because it’s bad… but because it’s speaking to someone who doesn’t exist yet - someone who already understands why they need what you’re selling.
Your prospects are past-you… and you keep talking to future-them.
Today, I’m sharing the dead-simple 3-question filter that ensures every DM passes the “Before You Were An Expert” test. Namely:
• The exact questions that reveal if your message will land or lose them
• Why past-you is your perfect prospect avatar (not your successful clients)
• Quick implementation guide that takes 30 seconds per message
Let’s make your DMs time-travel proof...
The 3-Question Filter That Fixes Your DM
Most coaches write DMs for people who already “get it” - forgetting that prospects don’t get it yet. That’s why they’re prospects.
Here’s how to fix every message in 30 seconds:
1️⃣ Question 1: Would Past-You Understand This?
You’re reviewing a DM you’re about to send.
You force yourself to read it through the eyes of yourself before you learned everything.
Before you understood the problem.
Before you knew solutions existed.
Before you spoke the language.
The Understanding Test:
Read your message and ask: “Would I have known what this person was talking about 5 years ago?”
❌ Your Current Message: “I help coaches optimize their client acquisition funnels through strategic content positioning and conversion rate optimization.”
🥴 Past-You’s Reaction: “What’s a funnel? What’s positioning? Why would I need to optimize anything? I just want clients.”
✅ The Fix: “I help coaches stop hoping someone will hire them and start knowing exactly where their next client is coming from.”
→ Healthcare Coach:
❌ Fails test: “I streamline patient onboarding workflows”
✅ Passes test: “I help you spend time with patients instead of paperwork”
→ Business Consultant:
❌ Fails test: “I facilitate organizational alignment”
✅ Passes test: “I get your team to actually agree on what to do next”
→ Fitness Coach:
❌ Fails test: “I design periodized training protocols”
✅ Passes test: “I help you get stronger without living at the gym”
If past-you would be confused, current-them will be too.
2️⃣ Question 2: Would Past-You Care?
You’ve made your message understandable… but understanding isn’t enough.
Past-you understood lots of things you didn’t care about.
You need to hit the nerve that past-you didn’t even know was exposed.
The Caring Test:
Ask: “Would past-me have stopped scrolling for this?”
❌ Your Current Message: “Learn my proven 6-step framework for building scalable systems”
🥴 Past-You’s Thought: “Why would I want to learn another framework? I’m already overwhelmed.”
✅ The Fix: “What if you could take a real vacation without checking your phone every hour?”
The Caring Triggers:
✅ Past-you cared about:
Getting home before 8 PM
Not feeling like a fraud
Having energy for family
Stopping the Sunday night dread
Actually enjoying work again
❌ Past-you didn’t care about:
Systems and frameworks
Best practices
Industry standards
Optimization
Scale
→ Healthcare Coach:
❌ Past-you doesn’t care: “Optimize your practice management”
✅ Past-you cares: “See your kids before bedtime”
→ Business Consultant:
❌ Past-you doesn’t care: “Implement agile methodologies”
✅ Past-you cares: “Stop refereeing team arguments”
→ Fitness Coach:
❌ Past-you doesn’t care: “Master movement patterns”
✅ Past-you cares: “Feel confident in a swimsuit”
If past-you wouldn’t care, neither will they.
3️⃣ Question 3: Would Past-You Reply?
Your message is clear. It hits a nerve. But would past-you actually respond?
Past-you was scared.
Skeptical.
Busy.
Overwhelmed.
Your message needs to feel like the easiest “yes” in their inbox.
The Reply Test:
Ask: “Would past-me have felt safe and curious enough to respond?”
❌ Your Current Message: “Interested in learning about my coaching program?”
🥴 Past-You’s Hesitation: “This feels like I’m signing up for a sales call. I’m not ready for that pressure.”
✅ The Fix: “Curious what changed for Sarah when she stopped doing everything herself?”
Reply Psychology:
✅ Past-you would reply to:
Questions about their specific situation
Curiosity about someone like them
Offers to share (not sell)
Permission to be honest
Validation of their struggle
❌ Past-you would ghost:
Requests for calls
Questions about budget
Invitations to “learn more”
Anything feeling salesy
Pressure to decide
→ Healthcare Coach:
❌ Ghost trigger: “Want to discuss my program?”
✅ Reply trigger: “What’s the one admin task that ruins your whole morning?”
→ Business Consultant:
❌ Ghost trigger: “Interested in a consultation?”
✅ Reply trigger: “What would you do with an extra 10 hours per week?”
→ Fitness Coach:
❌ Ghost trigger: “Ready to transform your body?”
✅ Reply trigger: “What’s your biggest frustration with working out right now?”
Make replying feel like continuing a conversation, not starting a sales process.
That’s it.
Here’s what you learned today:
→ Past-you is your perfect message filter
→ Understanding + Caring + Safety = Response
→ Your expertise blinds you to their beginner reality
Your prospects are living in your “before” story.
Speak to that version, not your “after.”
Now take your most-used DM template and run it through all 3 questions.
Be brutal. Past-you was.
You’ve evolved past your prospects’ awareness - that’s the problem.
When you can’t remember what it felt like to not know, you write messages that miss.
Today’s paid member mega-prompt helps you channel past-you for every message...ensuring you never miss their awareness level again.
Paid members get:
✔ Two versions of the prompt, 1 optimized for ChatGPT and 1 for Claude
✔ Instant past-you perspective translator
✔ Awareness level detector for any message
✔ 10 rewrites at different understanding levels
✔ Response probability scoring
✔ The “beginner’s mind” question bank
P.S. If you’re enjoying 8am in Atlanta, consider sharing it with a coach friend. They’ll get the same messaging strategies I’ve used to generate $3M+ in cash collected in <24 months for high-ticket programs… without sounding desperate.