How to stop killing your DM conversions with voice notes
Why your 2-minute voice note is making prospects disappear
The notification lit up your screen at 9:47 PM.
Sarah… the coach you’ve been trying to reach for three weeks… finally replied to your DM.
Not just any reply. A real question.
Specific. Thoughtful. About her exact pain point with client follow-up.
Your thumb hovered over the keyboard.
You could feel it… this is the message that’ll convert her.
You hit the microphone icon.
Two minutes of your best thinking poured out
Clear, strategic, immediately applicable.
You even paused mid-sentence to make sure the framework landed perfectly.
Send.
The next morning, you checked.
“Delivered” sat under your message like a tombstone.
By afternoon, still nothing.
You told yourself she’s busy. Coaches are busy. She’ll listen when she has time.
Two weeks later, she posted a client win on LinkedIn.
Tagged someone else.
Credited their “original approach to follow-up”
The same approach you explained in that voice note she never opened.
The advice was solid. The framework works. Your delivery was confident.
But she needed 90 seconds of uninterrupted attention in her car.
Instead of 5 sentences of text she could read between meetings.
You had the better answer. She needed the better format.
Here’s what nobody tells you about DM conversations: the medium you choose matters more than the message you send when you’re still earning trust.
Today I’m sharing the 3 deadly mistakes that kill warm leads before they ever hear what you have to say… and the relationship temperature system that tells you exactly when text stops working and voice starts winning:
• Mistake #1: Treating engagement like permission (why one reply doesn’t mean they’re ready to hear your voice)
• Mistake #2: Choosing format based on your comfort instead of their context (and why that kills momentum)
• Mistake #3: Using voice to “stand out” when text is actually your conversion tool (plus when voice finally works)
Let’s make sure your next warm lead doesn’t disappear because you sent the right message in the wrong format.
3 Deadly Mistakes That Kill Warm DM Conversations
Most coaches focus so much on what they say in DMs that they forget how they say it matters more when the relationship is new.
Here’s what’s actually sabotaging your best opportunities:
🚫 Mistake #1: You Treated Engagement Like Permission
She replied to your story.
In your head, that meant: “We have a relationship now.”
In her head, it meant: “I asked a question.”
Voice notes require EARNED attention.
Text can be skimmed during a meeting.
Voice demands they stop, find their AirPods, and commit 2 minutes to YOUR voice in their head.
❌ Before: Treating any reply as relationship proof
Prospect replies to your story
You immediately send a voice note explaining everything
Assume they’ll be excited to hear from you
Wonder why they never respond
✅ After: Respecting the actual relationship stage
Prospect replies to your story
You send a clear text answer that respects their question
Wait for their response to gauge interest
Voice notes only come after you’ve earned that level of access
Stop treating ANY engagement as relationship proof. One reply is curiosity, not commitment.
Text first for the first 1-2 exchanges, regardless of how warm they seem
Watch for signals they’re actually engaging (asking follow-up questions, sharing details, responding quickly)
Only consider voice after 3+ back-and-forth exchanges where they’re clearly interested
🚫 Mistake #2: You Optimized for YOUR Convenience, Not HER Context
You sent voice because typing out your framework felt like work.
But here’s what you didn’t consider:
Where was she when she’d see your message?
→ Probably in line at Starbucks.
→ Or between meetings.
→ Or sitting in a parking lot before walking into Target.
Your voice note required:
Privacy to listen
2 uninterrupted minutes
Earbuds if she’s in public
Enough care about you to do all that
You’d had ONE exchange.
She scrolled past your voice note and saw three TEXT replies to her other questions.
Guess which ones she answered?
❌ Before: Choosing medium based on your preference
“Voice notes are faster for me to send”
“I can explain better verbally”
“They’ll hear my energy and enthusiasm”
Send voice without considering their context
✅ After: Choosing medium based on their reality
“Where are they likely to be when they see this?”
“What format respects their available attention?”
“What can they engage with in 30 seconds between tasks?”
Text becomes the default for cold and warming relationships
Text respects their context. Voice demands they create context for you.
Ask yourself: “Would I be able to listen to a voice note right now if I were them?”
Default to text for anything that could be skimmed in under 20 seconds
Save voice for complex explanations… but only after you’ve earned that attention
🚫 Mistake #3: You Didn’t Realize Text IS the Conversion Tool
You thought:
“Voice notes are more personal! They’ll feel my energy!”
What actually happened:
She couldn’t screenshot your answer, couldn’t reference it later, couldn’t skim for the part that mattered.
Text converts cold leads because it’s:
Scannable (they find the value in 3 seconds)
Shareable (they can send it to their business partner)
Permanent (they can revisit when they’re ready)
Non-intrusive (fits their life, not demands attention)
Voice notes are for AFTER they’ve decided you’re worth hearing.
❌ Before: Using voice to “stand out” or “seem personal”
Send voice notes to differentiate yourself
Assume voice = more authentic connection
Use voice to explain your full framework
Miss the conversion because they couldn’t engage
✅ After: Using text as your primary conversion tool
Text is scannable and actionable
Voice comes AFTER text has built the relationship
Complex explanations still start with text summaries
Voice becomes a bonus, not the main message
What you should do now:
Track relationship temperature, not just engagement:
COLD (1-2 interactions): Text only. Clear, tight, valuable.
WARMING (3-5 back-and-forths): Still text, but you might ask: “Mind if I send a quick voice note on this?”
HOT (actively discussing working together): Voice becomes powerful. Tone conveys confidence and authority.
TL;DR
Meet them where they are, not where you wish they were.
Your framework isn’t the problem. Your medium choice is.
Before you send that voice note, check:
How many real exchanges have we had?
Have they asked questions that show genuine interest?
Would I be able to listen to this if I were in their shoes right now?
If the answer to any of these is “no,” send text.
One Action to Take Today
Go to your DMs right now.
Find the last 3 conversations where you sent voice notes to people who never responded. Look at how many exchanges you’d had before you sent voice.
I bet it’s 1-2.
Now rewrite what you would have said in that voice note as a text message. Keep it under 5 sentences.
That’s your new default for the first 3 exchanges.
You’re not losing leads because your offer is bad.
You’re losing them because you’re using voice notes when they need text.
When every warm lead feels like they might convert (but then they ghost), it’s usually a medium problem, not a message problem.
Today’s paid member mega-prompt helps you read relationship temperature in real-time and choose the right medium for every stage.
Paid members get:
✓ Instant relationship temperature assessment (cold/warming/hot based on actual conversation data)
✓ Specific guidance on whether your next message should be text or voice
✓ If text: The exact message written for you
✓ If voice: The 3 key points to cover in under 60 seconds
✓ Clear signals that indicate when someone is ready for voice notes