I never meant to turn off my sales brain… but that’s when it all clicked
For once, I stopped trying to ‘convert’… and that’s when the real connections (and booked sales calls) started
The electricity went out at 7:42 PM, putting Alex's apartment building into total darkness.
Outside, a severe thunderstorm was flooding the city, lightning streaking across the Austin skyline in brief flashes. Alex fumbled for her phone, activating the flashlight to navigate through her suddenly unfamiliar living room.
The sales call she was on had just ended when the power failed, and now her planned evening of content creation was impossible without Wi-Fi.
As she lit several candles, she realized this might be the first technology-free evening she'd had in months. "So this is what it was like in medieval times," she joked to herself, arranging the candles on her coffee table… "minus the Netflix withdrawal."
With nothing else to do, Alex settled onto her couch with a book she'd bought weeks ago, but hadn't started.
Two hours later, completely absorbed in the story, she was startled by a knock at her door. Through the peephole, she saw her elderly neighbor, Mrs. Chen, holding a flashlight.
"I'm checking on everyone in the building," Mrs. Chen explained when Alex opened the door "especially those who live alone."
"That's very kind of you," Alex replied, touched by the gesture… "i'm fine, just reading a book. Would you like to come in for some water or anything?"
Mrs. Chen declined politely, but continued the conversation, sharing that she'd lived in the building for 23 years and had experienced many power outages… "in the old days, this is when neighbors would actually talk to each other," she said with a smile.
They chatted for a few more minutes before Mrs. Chen continued her rounds to check on other residents. As Alex closed her door, she realized something remarkable had just happened.
Without any agenda or purpose, Mrs. Chen had created more goodwill in 3 minutes than most businesses manage in months of marketing. The difference was in the natural, unforced approach driven by genuine concern… rather than hidden motives.
When Lightning Strikes
The next morning, power restored, Alex found herself thinking about that brief interaction with Mrs. Chen while responding to Instagram DMs about her coaching program.
Her conversation with Mrs. Chen had been completely natural and unforced, creating an immediate sense of trust and connection.
In contrast, Alex's DM exchanges with potential clients for her coaching program often felt awkward and transactional, despite her best efforts to be helpful and authentic. She was trying too hard to "convert" leads, rather than guiding them toward natural next steps.
This realization led Alex to my CHARM Method, a systematic approach to DM messaging that mirrors genuine human interaction, while maintaining clear business purpose.
My CHARM Method
The ‘CHARM Method’ consists of five essential elements that transform sales-focused DMs into trust-building exchanges.
These elements naturally lead prospects toward a sales call, without the awkwardness of traditional sales approaches.
Each element addresses a specific aspect of authentic communication that builds trust and creates forward momentum:
1️⃣ C: Connect genuinely - "I noticed you mentioned struggling with content consistency. I've been there… spent 3 hours once trying to batch a week's worth of IG posts, and ended up with exactly zero I actually liked. What specifically feels hardest about staying consistent for you?"
This establishes authentic rapport before introducing any business purpose. It creates an immediate sense of understanding through shared experience.
2️⃣ H: Hear their needs - "That's interesting… you're saying you have the ideas, but struggle to translate them into content for health coaches who want to create group programs. What's your biggest challenge when creating content for that audience?"
This uses authentic curiosity to understand their specific challenges rather than pushing your own agenda.
3️⃣ A: Add specific value - "Based on what you've shared, it sounds like you're creating content that resonates with too broad an audience. One approach that's worked well for me is developing content specifically for the exact type of client I want to work with, not broad topics that could apply to anybody. What's your current process when you're creating content - starting with your ideal client in mind, or moreso gravitating to whatever's trending or going viral in your niche?
This provides immediate value tailored to their specific situation, without overwhelming them. The insight is helpful… regardless of whether they continue the conversation.
4️⃣ R: Reveal next steps - "Since you're focused on attracting health coaches who want to create group programs, I'd love to get a little more info about the exact type of coaches you serve and share a few frameworks that would immediately attract them to your content. Would that be helpful?"
This moves conversations forward based on engagement cues, rather than pushy transitions.
5️⃣ M: Make the invitation - "Ok, let's hop on a quick Zoom and I'll share some insights about content creation that’ll help you attract coaches who are the exact right fit for your offer. Whether we decide to work together or not, at the very least, you'll walk away with some insights that you can implement immediately… would later today work, or would tomorrow be better?
This maintains genuine care, regardless of immediate business outcomes.
Most sell-by-chat advice teaches coaches to approach DMs as "closing opportunities," rather than human exchanges. This creates the very resistance and awkwardness that prevents a natural conversion to the sales call.
Think about it from the lead’s perspective, if the DM convo is pitch after pitch, then the “strategy call” is surely going to be a pitch fest as well.
By implementing my ‘CHARM Method’ in your DM funnel, you create messaging experiences that feel like confiding in a friend, while still moving purposefully toward a sales call.
Rewiring Your Approach (Complete This Today)
So let's transform your DM convos into authentic exchanges that naturally lead to sales calls…
Here's what to do right now to implement the ‘CHARM Method’ in your DM funnel:
STEP 1: Review your Instagram DMs and identify one conversation that feels forced or stalled.
Choose an exchange where you sense the prospect has potential, but you turned them off being too “pitchy”. Copy the full conversation into a document.
🔷 Highlight moments where the conversation feels most unnatural or sales-y.
STEP 2: Ask yourself: "If this person was sitting across from me at a coffee shop with no business agenda..."
What would I genuinely want to know about their situation? Write down 3-5 natural questions you'd ask out of authentic curiosity.
🔷 Identify what's preventing this genuine curiosity from appearing in your DM convos.
STEP 3: Rewrite your side of the conversation using the CHARM Method.
Replace business-focused questions with curiosity-driven exploration. Substitute pitchy language with authentic value aligned to their needs.
🔷 Transform direct call-to-actions with natural next steps that feel right for where they are.
STEP 4: Write a new DM to send to that same prospect using your new approach.
Before sending, ask yourself: "Does this sound like me talking to a friend who needs help?" Create a simple reminder card or post-it note with the CHARM elements to keep by your desk.
🔷 Commit to approaching all new DM conversations with this mindset for one week.
Power Restored
After implementing this framework in her Instagram DM strategy, Alex saw immediate shifts in how prospects responded to her messages.
Conversation lengths increased, engagement deepened, and most surprisingly, call booking suggestions were met with enthusiasm… rather than hesitation.
By focusing on natural conversation flow rather than conversion tactics, Alex actually improved her business results, while reducing the awkwardness that had previously characterized her messaging approach.
The most unexpected benefit wasn't just more enrollments in her $6,500 program, it was more enjoyment of the business development process.
By approaching DM convos as authentic human exchanges rather than "sales conversations," Alex transformed what had been her most dreaded daily task into a genuinely pleasurable experience. The method allowed her to be herself, while still achieving her business goals.
Two months later, during another thunderstorm, Alex's building lost power again.
This time, instead of staying in her apartment, she knocked on several neighbors' doors to check on them, including Mrs. Chen, who seemed delighted by the role reversal.
The simple act of genuine human connection without agenda had come full circle, both in Alex's personal life and her business approach. She had learned that the most powerful sales conversations don't feel like selling at all… they feel like someone genuinely trying to help.
The power outage had brought to light a fundamental truth (pun intended 🤣)… in a world of increasingly transactional communication, natural human connection will always stand out, because it’s become so rare.
By bringing these natural conversation principles into her Instagram DM strategy, Alex had found the perfect balance between authentic connection and strategic direction… filling her coaching program with clients who were selling themselves on the program, instead of the other way around.
Today’s Mega-Prompt: "CHARM Method DM Conversation Analyzer"
If your DMs feel forced, flat, or overly sales-y… you’re not alone. Most good leads slip away because the conversation lacked curiosity, not value. Today, we fix that.
This mega-prompt helps paid members turn cold or stalled DM conversations into authentic, trust-building exchanges using the CHARM Method. You’ll get a full message rewrite, plus 3 re-engagement messages crafted to restart the conversation without pressure.
Paid members get exclusive access to a mega-prompt that delivers:
✔ A full analysis of what went wrong in your original DM conversation
✔ A complete rewrite using the CHARM Method
✔ 3 ready-to-send re-engagement messages designed to break resistance and reignite interest